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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27662962">everything i didn't say</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/skybeom/pseuds/skybeom'>skybeom</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>TOMORROW X TOGETHER | TXT (Korea Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Best Friends in Love, Drunk confessions, M/M, alcohol and drinking, soobin is hopelessly gay, soogyu, taejunkai are just here for a good time</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 22:22:28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>4,449</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27662962</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/skybeom/pseuds/skybeom</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>it's always going to be beomgyu and soobin.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Choi Beomgyu/Choi Soobin</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>82</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>everything i didn't say</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>i really enjoy writing soogyu so here's something i've been working on hehe, please enjoy! this may be a little rushed sorry ;;</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“hyung. please, i’m begging you!” beomgyu had been whining in soobin’s ear for the past twenty minutes about this party yeonjun had invited them all to on saturday and soobin’s immediate response had been a flat out, resounding No.</p><p> </p><p>“soobinnie, it’ll be fun!” it was yeonjun’s turn to pout in his direction now and soobin had just about had it with them both. taehyun and kai were currently in class but he could expect them to add to the protest he had endured while the three boys were meant to be studying in the library. the pair in front of him had now resorted to just giving him puppy-dog eyes, after receiving several dirty looks from the librarian for being too loud. </p><p> </p><p>“you and me can get ready at my place.” beomgyu suggested, bottom lip jutted out.</p><p> </p><p>okay so, maybe it was time to give in, soobin was something of a sucker for beomgyu’s puppy eyes after all. plus, perhaps he’d get some studying done. </p><p> </p><p>“fine. whatever, i’ll go.” he sighed. was he going to regret this? most likely. but somehow he was always coerced into these things, especially when yeonjun was involved and <em> especially </em> when beomgyu was involved.</p><p> </p><p>“YES!” the two high-fived, ignoring both the librarian’s shushes and soobin’s unimpressed face. </p><p> </p><p>“i can’t wait.” beomgyu grinned gratefully at soobin.</p><p> </p><p>don’t get soobin wrong, he <em> loved </em>spending time with his friends. but that was when it was just them five. when they were spending the day in yeonjun’s bedroom watching the avengers for the nth time or lazing around kai’s living room playing super smash bros to the death. </p><p> </p><p><em> not </em>when they were in some random house where soobin had to scream to talk to them over music he hated, tail around taehyun and kai all night to stop them getting too drunk, (he felt way too responsible for the two) and watch beomgyu and yeonjun partake in overly competitive games of beer pong, one time being the result of yeonjun not even making it home. soobin had to drag the boy from his front garden up into his bedroom, all while avoiding his sleeping parents. he groaned at the thought of reliving it all over again this weekend.</p><p> </p><p>“oh! my parents are away too so you can all stay at mine too.” offered beomgyu with a smug smile on his face, as if reading soobin’s mind. him and yeonjun began delving into the logistics of it all while soobin just prayed they’d make it out in one piece. the pair had quite a history of making parties hell for soobin.</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>the group made it through the rest of the week uneventfully, which was suspicious in its own right but soobin was just relieved. tonight was the party and he would be lying if he said anxiety wasn’t catching up to him. he did consider cancelling two times already, but both times put his phone back down when he remembered how excited beomgyu was when he agreed to go. </p><p> </p><p>that boy had soobin wrapped around his pinky finger. he’d never admit it out loud but it was plain to see anyway. there was no way that it went unnoticed by beomgyu either. when soobin was involved, what beomgyu wants, beomgyu gets. unlike soobin, beomgyu was confident. knew what he was doing. and most of all, unafraid. the two of them had always been a little different from the rest. movie night in yeonjun’s bedroom? beomgyu’s body would be curled into soobin’s, hands tangled together while the rest spread out across the room.</p><p> </p><p>“<em> just in case there’s any scary parts” </em>he’d say, fitting his hand into soobin’s.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “beomgyu, this is frozen.” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>“<em> shut up hyung.”  </em></p><p> </p><p>and shut up soobin did. if beomgyu wanted to hold soobin’s hand who was he to say no?  beomgyu may have been shy with his actions but they were actions nonetheless. all soobin could do was bottle up his feelings and affection inside and occasionally spill them out to yeonjun, over text. and that was strictly past 3am. </p><p> </p><p>so, soobin could say he was in love with beomgyu. or maybe it was still just a crush but soobin doesn’t think you crush on your best friend for two years. he also doesn’t think you reject every confession within those two years in hopes that one day the confession would be beomgyu’s. maybe it <em> was </em> just a crush at first, beomgyu was funny, outgoing and not to mention, attractive. then for a reason soobin couldn’t decipher, he had tried <em> so hard </em> to worm his way into soobin’s life. so yes, soobin was flattered, a little confused but beomgyu made him <em> happy </em> and was the first close friend he’d ever had so sue him for harboring a silly little crush. </p><p> </p><p>soobin couldn’t quite pinpoint where crush turned to falling in love, where <em> this reminds me of you </em> turned into <em> i cant stop thinking about you with everything that i do. </em> where home turned from the four walls of his parent’s house to a boy whose eyes hold the galaxy and more, whose warmth made everything feel <em> okay. </em>everything was always okay when beomgyu was there. soobin just remembers the aggressive tightness inside of his chest when beomgyu revealed he had a crush on some senior (long forgotten now). realised he was jealous and this was a little more intense than a crush.</p><p> </p><p>he’d like to think yeonjun was the only one that knew but soobin and beomgyu seemed to constantly be toeing the line. the hand holding, the cuddling, the late night phone calls and their sleepovers. the excuses to spend time alone, the way taehyun and kai snickered when beomgyu started talking about soobin again, the way-</p><p> </p><p>soobin’s love spiral was interrupted by his ringtone. beomgyu’s name glowed on the screen. sighing, he slid up the green phone icon, leaving his phone on speaker beside him and staring up at the ceiling.</p><p> </p><p>“hyung! are you still coming to mine?” beomgyu sounded full of zest, obviously excited for the party. “it’s going to be just us two.” soobin could only imagine the waggle of beomgyu’s brows with this and snorted.</p><p> </p><p>“of course i am gyu.” he affirmed.</p><p> </p><p>after beomgyu delved into further details about the party (held by a park jimin on yeonjun’s dance team apparently, a couple of blocks away) he informed soobin he would come and pick him up and they’d walk back to beomgyu’s together. soobin had some idea that this was to prevent him from avoiding the party. beomgyu had always known him too well. </p><p> </p><p>later that day, soobin opened up the door to a smiling beomgyu who asked if he was ready and soobin had barely finished saying yes before he was promptly dragged out of his own house. the walk back to beomgyu’s was short, him only living on the next street but soobin was all too aware of every brush of their hands, the beam of the setting sun sitting on beomgyu’s skin, the eventide glowing golden on his face. a light summer breeze flowing through his freshly dyed black hair, slightly misplacing the curls beomgyu had most likely spent an inhumane amount of time perfecting. the scene was unadulterated beauty and soobin felt himself falling just a little bit more. beomgyu made it so easy.</p><p> </p><p>on the arrival at beomgyu’s house, soobin was forced to pull himself out of his daze as beomgyu took it upon himself to unpack soobin’s clothes and begin putting together an outfit. </p><p> </p><p>“soobin…” beomgyu grimaced, holding up two of his hoodies. “you’re not getting dressed up?”</p><p> </p><p>soobin just rolled his eyes, he didn’t get caught up in fashion the way beomgyu and yeonjun did, preferring to keep himself comfortable first. on other other hand, beomgyu was now modelling his outfit (bought especially for tonight) to soobin.</p><p> </p><p>he smiled, satisfied, turning around from himself in the mirror. “what do you think?”</p><p> </p><p>soobin took in the sight before him. beomgyu had on his black skinny jeans, a new black, tight-fitting top and a black leather jacket. he also adorned his ears with multiple silver hoops, a small chain necklace and then hanging around his wrist was the bracelet soobin had gifted him for his birthday. </p><p> </p><p>“you look great!” soobin forced out. beomgyu looked more than just <em> great </em> but soobin had to keep it together.</p><p> </p><p>beomgyu’s grin only grew with his compliment. “thanks hyung. can you help me with my makeup?”</p><p> </p><p>soobin could have stopped breathing. “makeup?” beomgyu was going to send him into an early grave tonight.</p><p> </p><p>returning with an eyeliner pencil and what looked like a pot of glitter, he sat himself in front of soobin.</p><p> </p><p>“now i’m just going to hold my eye like this.” beomgyu demonstrated, pulling his bottom eyelid down. “and you just need to put it on the waterline.” he instructed, holding out the pencil.</p><p> </p><p>soobin stared dumbly at it before taking it out slowly. he slid off the lid with a pop and gave beomgyu a hesitant look who only smiled encouragingly. scooting closer, soobin tried to ignore the sirens going off inside of his brain because <em> their faces were going to be so close. </em> as he reached his hand behind beomgyu’s head for balance and leaned in to apply the makeup, he ignored the thoughts telling him <em> this is what it would be like to kiss him. </em> he steadied his hand and smudged the black under one eye successfully. with a shaky breath and a lot of ignoring his inner monologue, he mirrored the action on beomgyu’s other eye then swiftly shifted back.</p><p> </p><p>“done!” he breathed out, a little too suddenly but beomgyu was too distracted by appreciating his eyeliner. while soobin tried to catch his breath, he watched the other boy embellish the skin under his eyes with a few small gems. it was like he was on a mission to personally destroy soobin today.</p><p> </p><p>“do i look good?” beomgyu asked, looking up and catching soobin’s eyes.</p><p> </p><p>“yeah.” soobin breathed.</p><p> </p><p>after another half an hour of beomgyu fussing over his and soobin’s appearance, the two finally left the house and walked together to the party. beneath the low light of dusk, beomgyu’s features weren’t as prominent as earlier but soobin couldn’t help but notice how much he fit into the night. black hair, black hair outfit, jewels under his eyes glinting below the streetlight. the night sky gives many gifts; the moon, the stars, but to soobin, it was beomgyu. his <em>very</em> <em>own </em>moon and stars. not just in the sense of beauty and wonder, but in almost a literal sense too. the way the moon’s gravity pulls at earth, is much like how soobin has always gravitated to beomgyu.</p><p> </p><p>jimin’s house was practically teeming with both high school and college students, soobin noted upon the pair’s arrival to the house. they hadn’t even entered yet but regret was already crawling in his stomach.</p><p> </p><p>“soobin, beomgyu!” came yeonjun’s more than cheerful greeting from across the lawn. he was standing at the front door, taehyun and kai tailing him. stumbling down the steps he approached the two with open arms.</p><p> </p><p>i’m so <em> glad </em> you both made it!” he looked genuinely relieved and soobin guesses he must be a little tipsy already.</p><p> </p><p>taehyun grabs both beomgyu and soobin’s hands and begins dragging them inside the house. “hyungs, we were about to start on beer pong!”</p><p> </p><p>beomgyu doesn’t resist, tripping over his feet a little as he allows taehyun to guide him there while soobin begrudgingly follows. he looks back at yeonjun and kai, who were now immersed in some kind of game involving flipping bottles and soobin calls out to them to catch up. upon entering the house he’s greeted by some classmates, (some of which he has barely spoken to) and then is hit with the unmistakable smell of alcohol and weed. </p><p> </p><p>soon the five are gathered around a ping pong table, red cups generously filled with beer by yeonjun. soobin, beomgyu and taehyun on one team and yeonjun and kai on the other. hyunjin from soobin’s biology class did offer to even out the teams but yeonjun’s beer pong pride was too high to accept.</p><p> </p><p>taehyun and kai played rock, paper, scissors to decide who took the first throw which ended up with kai losing. beomgyu insisted on shooting first, perfectly landing the ball and cheering the loudest when yeonjun downed the cup. however, he was forced to swallow his pride when yeonjun landed his own ball and it was beomgyu’s turn to drink. the five continued back and forth like this until yeonjun and kai eventually won much to nobody’s surprise. yeonjun<em> always </em> won. despite this, beomgyu was still accusing them of cheating and calling foul play and in the midst of the four bickering soobin excused himself just as they called a rematch.</p><p> </p><p>his head was spinning a little from the beer, he had always been a bit of a lightweight and amongst the chaos in the room he decided he just needed air. pushing through all the people, soobin found himself in the back garden and sat on the grass, not caring if he looked strange to anyone around him. he took a deep breath in and watched the vapor twist into the air with an exhale, letting himself relax with the faint bass of the music. it was quieter, less crowded and open out here which soon settled his dizziness. </p><p> </p><p>after a few minutes of vague mindfulness, he felt a hand on his shoulder.</p><p> </p><p>“soobin, right?”</p><p> </p><p>hyunjin. </p><p> </p><p>soobin doesn’t know if the boy had followed him here or if it was a coincidence but whatever this was, he wasn’t interested. he responded only by nodding, hoping his dull response would drive him away but it went unnoticed. hyunjin sat himself on the ground in front of soobin abd began chatting animatedly about the party to which soobin just continued nodding and agreeing where he felt appropriate. this is why he hated these parties. conversations he couldn’t escape were not his forte, drunk people were generally ignorant to the lack of interest and soobin was too nice to tell them to get lost as yeonjun had tried to teach him.</p><p> </p><p>he searched for someone, anyone he knew about in an attempt to use as an escape but now hyunjin was more than obviously flirting, complimenting his outfit and inviting him to spend time together one day. soobin <em> really </em> wasn’t interested.</p><p> </p><p>“you look really pretty tonight, soobin.” hyunjin told him, as he pulled himself closer. soobin knew exactly where this was going and before hyunjin could get closer, a voice behind him stopped him.</p><p> </p><p>“soobinie! hyung i’ve been looking for you everywhere~” beomgyu placed his hand on soobin’s shoulder and sat himself beside him.</p><p> </p><p>hyunjin looked mildly confused at the interruption and beomgyu simply glared at him. </p><p> </p><p>“do you mind? i’m here for soobin-hyung.” he sneered.</p><p> </p><p>soobin rolled his eyes as hyunjin made a childish face at beomgyu, but walked away nonetheless. soobin was secretly grateful.</p><p> </p><p>“i missed you so much hyung.” beomgyu pouted, clearly more drunk than the last time soobin saw him. (it wasn’t unheard of yeonjun to add shots to beer pong) he rested his head on soobin’s shoulder and all but sunk him into him. he felt beomgyu pick up his hand and begin playing with his fingers and soobin couldn’t hold back his smile.</p><p> </p><p>“i missed you too, gyu.” he mumbled. and it was the truth. as soobin had searched for a familiar face, he had ignored that ever present ache in his chest, hoping beomgyu would materialise out of nowhere. at this statement, beomgyu looked straight at him. he looked… surprised? usually beomgyu would reply with a laugh or an <em> “of course you did. you love me too much.” </em>the confusion must have shown on soobin’s face.</p><p> </p><p>“i think hyunjin was trying to <em> steal </em> you from me.” beomgyu conspired, very seriously. soobin couldn’t help but laugh at his ridiculous accusation which beomgyu seemed offended by.</p><p> </p><p> “hyung, i want everyone to know you’re all mine.” he scowled. he wrapped his arms around soobin and hugged him closer. and soobin couldn’t help but feed into it. </p><p> </p><p>“im all yours beomgyu.” if only it were true.</p><p> </p><p>after several more minutes of allowing beomgyu to trap him in his embrace, the pair attempted to round up the other three. however, it was more soobin searching with beomgyu clinging onto his arm, shooting everyone who so much as looked at soobin the best evil eyes he could muster. he found the smaller boy very cute.</p><p> </p><p>yeonjun was found dancing amongst his teammates and of course beomgyu had to join in. soobin left them to it in search of taehyun and kai who were by the drinks in the kitchen. they seemed to have created some kind of purple concoction and were handing it out for two dollars a solo cup. soobin wanted to chastise them but actually, he was rather proud of their entrepreneurship. nevertheless, he still dragged them away from their newly opened business. anything could be in those cups.</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>a while later, soobin finally had the four boys gathered up and as per beomgyu’s offer a few days prior, the five would be staying at his house since his parents were away on business. luckily, his house was a short walk away, making the journey bearable. beomgyu had apparently snuck a few drinks before they left, making him and yeonjun unbearably drunk. both clung to one side of soobin as they sung a rendition of one direction’s ‘what makes you beautiful’ with a very uncoordinated dance routine. taehyun and kai were in a better state, behind the three, giggling to themselves and holding hands. the walk home didn’t get much more eventful than that. beomgyu and yeonjun delved deeper into the discography of one direction and soobin had to convince taehyun not to steal a neighbourhood cat but they made it back to beomgyu’s in one piece.</p><p> </p><p>the spare room was assigned to taehyun and kai and yeonjun, two on the double bed and one on the mattress and soobin and beomgyu would be sharing beomgyu’s bed. they had countless sleepovers before so this wasn’t anything new. beomgyu flopped onto his bed still in his shirt and jeans next to soobin who was already dozing off. he shuffled closer and lay facing soobin.</p><p> </p><p>“hey.” he whispered. soobin opened his eyes to be met with beomgyu’s own. he reached out and soobin felt hands start brushing through his hair and he sunk into the feeling. a drunk beomgyu had always been particularly affectionate. soobin could see his eyebrows furrow above his piercing stare. it was slightly unsettling.</p><p> </p><p>“hyung, did you mean what you said earlier?” his hands slowed down in soobin’s hair who gave beomgyu a confused look.</p><p> </p><p>“when you said you’re all mine.”</p><p> </p><p>amongst the chaos in the past hour soobin had forgot about their exchange in the garden which he had hoped beomgyu would simply forget. a memory that would blend in with the rest of the night.</p><p> </p><p>“i-” soobin began.</p><p> </p><p>but beomgyu interrupted “because i want it to be true.” </p><p> </p><p>he was drunk, soobin reminded himself.</p><p> </p><p>“go to sleep, gyu.”</p><p> </p><p>“i’m serious!” beomgyu was whining now, becoming visibly upset. soobin looked at him, unimpressed but urged him to continue.</p><p> </p><p>so he did. beomgyu grabbed soobin’s hands and started playing with his fingers for the second time that night. he giggled and hid his face behind both their hands.</p><p> </p><p>“hyung.” his voice was muffled but soobin could still make out his words. “i don’t know if you’ve noticed but i really like you. like- so much.”</p><p> </p><p>there it was. and soobin had waited <em> so long </em> for this moment but now beomgyu was drunk and silly and he probably didn’t know what he was saying. despite this, soobin was still overcome with some sort of relief. it wasn’t the shock he’d imagined it would be, but to know his feelings might actually be reciprocated rendered him unsure what to do with himself. if it was just the alcohol speaking, soobin would deal with that in the morning. for now.</p><p> </p><p>“you do?” he whispered. he lowered his hands from beomgyu’s face and made eye contact with the boy who was suddenly acting shy. he was so endearing in the way he just nodded back.</p><p> </p><p>“well, i like you too.” soobin smiled. </p><p> </p><p>“no.”  no? beomgyu’s interception caught him off guard.</p><p> </p><p>his face morphed into something serious, hesitant in his words.</p><p> </p><p> “hyung i don’t just <em> like you. </em>” beomgyu took a deep breath. “i think i love you.” </p><p> </p><p>the silence that overtook the pair was the heaviest they had ever shared. they were still holding hands, legs tangled under the covers. soobin didn’t quite know how to respond, hearing beomgyu say it out loud in <em> that </em>way was certainly nothing short of breathtaking.</p><p> </p><p>“please say something.”</p><p> </p><p>soobin fought within himself. he loved beomgyu too. he knew he did. but again, the boy was <em> drunk </em>and he was always an overly loving drunk. he had even confessed love to his pet fish one time when under the influence so doubt was seriously hanging over soobin’s mind.</p><p> </p><p>“you’re drunk gyu.” he said softly, smiling pitifully. maybe he would regret this but he couldn’t indulge. he wouldn’t allow himself. but beomgyu didn’t take well to this. his expression quickly became something akin to hurt and confusion and he snatched his hand away, sitting upright before soobin could say another word.</p><p> </p><p>“you don’t believe me, do you?” soobin had nothing to say in response at beomgyu’s unexpected reaction. he tried to say something but beomgyu wasn’t finished.</p><p> </p><p>“i just said what i’ve been meaning to say for <em> so long </em> and that’s all you can say? im <em> drunk?” </em> he was growing increasingly red in the face with his rant. “yes i am drunk but i couldn’t do this sober soobin. since the day i first saw your pretty face, i’ve liked you. we’ve spent everyday together and you know <em> everything </em>about me.” he took a few deep breaths and soobin was just shocked into silence.</p><p> </p><p>“hyung, you know everything because you’re the only one i can be myself with. and <em> i love you </em>. i love your dimples, and how you can’t help but be so kind, how you made us five into a family, how you let me cry on you and never made me explain myself and how i feel at home with you” beomgyu was welling up now, soobin scooted closer and wiped a tear with his thumb and beomgyu didn’t pull away. "you make it so easy, soobin."</p><p> </p><p>he was staring at soobin now, expecting him to say something but what could soobin say? this is all he’s ever wanted to hear? how he could say the exact same things back? he didn’t know what to say so he simply pulled beomgyu close into his chest where he could feel his heart beating just for him and let the boy drift off with dried tear tracks replacing the gems that had been there earlier.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>when soobin awoke, beomgyu was still curled into his chest and his stomach sank as the events of last night settled into his head. the house seemed dead silent so he could only assume the others were still sleeping too. he daren’t move, wanting to keep beomgyu sleeping as long as possible so he gently played with his hair instead, and replayed every word of his confession.</p><p> </p><p>around twenty minutes later, he started stirring and groaned into the sheets.</p><p> </p><p>“fuck.” he grabbed his head, presumably which was in pain and reached out for his water bottle that soobin had placed the night before. however, beomgyu seemed to come to his senses as he shuffled around and looked straight at soobin. his expression instantly changed from pain to regret. soobin had hoped to god he would have just simply forgotten what happened but his face told a different story.</p><p> </p><p>“hyung..” he started groggily. </p><p> </p><p>“its okay beomgyu. you don’t need to apologise.” </p><p> </p><p>“still, i’m sorry.” he smiled apologetically but his eyes were sad and he couldn’t look at soobin any longer so he dragged himself into the shower. soobin accepted that they were leaving it there and laid back down. he played with the thought of texting yeonjun but then remembered he’d be in a state too. maybe later.</p><p> </p><p>beomgyu toweled his wet hair and sat on the edge of his bed, with his back to soobin.</p><p> </p><p>“so you didn’t mean it?” soobin shocked himself with this. he hadn’t planned on taking up the situation any further but his mouth apparently had other plans.</p><p> </p><p>beomgyu turned around, he looked shocked too. he opened his mouth a couple of times to respond but was silent for a few moments.</p><p> </p><p>“did you?” he questioned. his voice turned to a mumble. “you said you liked me too.”</p><p> </p><p>“come here.” soobin sighed, patting the spot beside him. beomgyu crawled over his bed and their position was almost identical to last night. soobin didn’t know why he was doing this but he bit the bullet. they were too far in to turn back now.</p><p> </p><p>“i meant it gyu. i only- the only reason i didn’t say i love you back was because i was scared.” his voice was audibly shaking now. he’d never been good at talking about his feelings. “i was scared it was just the alcohol talking.” he closed his eyes and didn’t dare allow himself to see beomgyu’s face.</p><p> </p><p>“oh, hyung.” beomgyu’s voice cracked and he grabbed either side of soobin’s face. “open your eyes.” he whispered, the sofest he ever had.</p><p> </p><p>soobin reluctantly opened them, anxious to see beomgyu’s expression but when he met his eyes they were so gentle. this was soobin’s favourite beomgyu. loving, gentle, soft beomgyu.</p><p> </p><p>beomgyu who was leaning in closer to soobin’s face and he allowed it. he allowed himself to bring his head closer until their noses bumped and then felt beomgyu’s smile against his face and a low giggle. he allowed himself to return the kiss when beomgyu pressed his lips against soobin’s ever so softly. it was short and sweet but it was delicate and it was precious and it was <em> theirs </em>. soobin’s heart was about to beat through his chest at the feeling, but he made sure to lock every second into memory. the two rested their foreheads together and beomgyu giggled while he fiddled with soobin’s hoodie in his fists. it's always going to be him.</p><p> </p><p>“i love you, soobin. and i mean it.” he affirmed.</p><p> </p><p>soobin gathered the boy into his chest, like he was afraid to let go. “i love you, gyu, i promise i'm all yours."</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>as always, i hope you enjoyed reading!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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